When our son was born he brought a lot of love into our family. When he was seven years old, he was invited to Sunday school with his friends. Soon after, he gave his life to Christ. He brought me into church and shortly after, his dad followed. He was dedicated and took part in church activities. His Sunday school teacher told us that he was her star pupil and was always kind and thoughtful to others. He was different to his two older brothers; he didn’t go in for sport and such.
When he was eleven years old he had an accident and his leg was put into a plaster cast. We were told it would take six months to heal. After three months he went forward on his crutches at church for healing as his faith was very strong. When he saw the consultant, he had the cast removed to see how his leg was healing, with the intent to have the cast replaced. The consultant was amazed to find the leg was healed, and we witnessed to him about the power of prayer.
When our son reached high school, we knew nothing of the bullying he went through. He had already started the battle with his sexuality. As he reached fourteen years old, he was baptized where he gave his testimony and spoke about his healing.
Not long after, a youth leader led the group through a bible study about homosexuality where they were told that those that had homosexual thoughts were destined for eternal damnation. Our son never returned to church! For five years, he lived in torment and had regular migraines. We didn’t have a clue what he was going through as to us he was still our loving sensitive son.
At the age of 19, my husband and I came home from church one Sunday to find him really upset. He told us to sit down as he had something to tell us. He had already packed a bag ready to leave. He told us that he was gay and was to be eternally damned. I just threw my arms around him and told him how much we loved him and always would. His dad went ghostly white and ran to fetch his bible. “Son”, he said, “read Psalm 139. God knew you before you were in your mother’s womb”. Our son told us he could not come back to church to be a hypocrite!
There are no words to explain the emotions that followed that day. I know God gave us three sons he trusted us with and unconditional love. As Christians we thought we would cope, but when we needed support there was none.
It has been a very painful walk. The little boy who was encouraged in church life suddenly it was as though he had died when people found out he was gay. There was one lady who would ask after our son and that was his Sunday school teacher as she still had love for him.
There has been so many painful words spoken to us. One particular conversation that cut me was when I was told that I could not bless my son. We felt very damaged for a long time, but thank God, he has found us a safe haven now, and his love helps us to overcome the hurts. We now have a very happy established 40 year old son who is gay. He has been with his partner for fourteen years, so we have another son to love. They both have important jobs serving the needy. We are very proud of our son and love him. My prayer is that I may be able to come alongside other mothers and hug them and tell them that Jesus loves her child too!